Hello, my favourite human! That's right, it's me, your dog!

You are the person who gives me yummy treats, belly rubs and the best butt scratches ever! However, some things are often misunderstood between us. I have written this letter to help you understand me better and to share with you the things I have always wanted you to know.

As dogs, our way of communicating is different to yours! Some of us grow up alongside you from puppyhood, while others come into your home from rescue situations. Either way, we step into an unfamiliar world full of strange noises, new rules and expectations that we have to meet. Maybe you're expecting us to fill the shoes of the dog that came before us, or you're worried about what society will say if we misbehave. For the most part, we do pretty well, all things considered!

Like when you say "Right" just before standing up from the sofa, I know that means you are about to move, and I need to be ready for anything.

The tricky part is that humans often misunderstand our communication or miss it entirely. Most of the time, it’s not intentional; it’s simply because you don’t know what to look out for or how to read our body language or you don't know the truth behind our actions.

This letter is to help us break that barrier between us and hopefully strengthen our bond, because I do love you, even if you don't think I do sometimes.

Things I wish I could tell you:

1. There are only three reasons I won’t do what you ask of me:

   - I don't know the command, either you haven't taught it to me properly or at all.

   - The motivation isn't good enough, the treats you are using are boring, or I need a different form of motivation, like a toy or fuss.

   - The distractions are too much, and I can't focus. Let's try this again in a calmer environment first.

   
   

2. You should really throw out all of those old chews and torn-up toys. I won't miss them, and you'll be keeping me safe by binning them!

   Old antlers and marrow-filled bones, etc, can become sharp and dangerous over time, and the ripped toys can go too! I could accidentally swallow the stuffing, threads or fibres, and they might cause blockages in my stomach. It's best that you supervise me with all toys and chews anyway, just in case.

   
   

3. The toys that we do keep could do with a wash, they smell! Dirty toys and lick mats can hold bacteria and germs that could make me poorly. You can throw most of my soft toys in the washing machine, and the harder bits are often dishwasher-safe. You could also use the bathtub or just wash them by hand. Either way, a clean toy means a healthier, happier me! Don't forget to wash my food and water bowls regularly, too.

   
   

4. Dog body language is easy to understand once you know it. I would love it if you took some time to learn how I communicate, not just with you but with other people and dogs, too. After all, I have learned what your little movements and sounds mean.

   The better you understand me, the stronger our bond can become, and you'll be able to keep me happier and safer.

   

5. Prevention is better than a cure, right?

   If I try to sneak food off the countertops, it’s not because I’m being naughty; I just can’t resist. Instead of getting frustrated, wouldn’t it be easier to keep food out of my reach?

   And those slippers I love to chew? It’s nothing personal! But if you don’t want them to become my new favourite toy, keeping them somewhere safe is the best way to avoid trouble. Why make both our lives harder? A little common sense goes a long way in making life easier for both of us!

   
   

6. I never do anything intending to annoy you or make you mad. I am not being naughty on purpose or specifically trying to make your life hell. When I show a behaviour, it's always for a reason:

   - I don't know what behaviour you want from me.

   - You’ve accidentally taught me that this behaviour gets me something I want. Whether it’s attention, food, or freedom, I repeat what works.

   - I am in pain, I am scared, or I am overstimulated.

   Any attention, whether it's you praising me or telling me off, is a reinforcer. Any touch, whether it's you patting me or pushing me off, is a reinforcer. Any food, whether used as a reward or a distraction, is a reinforcer.

7. Sometimes, I need some "me" time away from you and the family. This is not a reflection on you! You know how you need time to yourself? Dogs need the same. I would love it if I had a specific area in the house where I could go to be left alone. The rule is that if I go to that safe space, no one should approach me until I come out of it. A crate, bed or den would work perfectly for this! Not sure about crates? Check out this human-written blog post about it here!

   
   

8. Punishment and Dominance have no place in our relationship! Physical correction, yelling at me or dominating me is only going to scare me and destroy my trust in you. There are so many better ways to train me. You can read about them in this post here!

   
   

9. Grooming me is just as important as training me!

   I may not love it, and sometimes I might put up a fight. But if that happens, it just means we need to work on making grooming a more positive experience before moving forward.

   You need to keep my coat in good condition—brushing, trimming, or clipping, depending on my breed. My claws should stay short enough that they don’t cause me pain, and my ears and teeth need regular cleaning to keep me healthy.

   I might also need frequent baths, depending on my breed and whether I enjoy mud baths a little too much! Grooming me is also a great way for you to check me over and ensure there are no lumps, bumps or abnormalities on me!

   
   

10. Please keep me vaccinated and up to date on worm and flea treatments! I may not love vet visits—and I might even put up a bit of a protest—but regular check-ups are important for my health. A good vet will take the time to get to know us both!

    
    

11. I don’t feel guilt the way you think I do. That famous “guilty” puppy-eye look? It’s actually a learned response! I’ve figured out that when I give you that expression, I get attention—whether it’s comfort, reassurance, or just a change in your tone.

    
    

12. Yawns aren't always because I'm tired. Most of the time, my yawning is a sign of stress. I'm trying to defuse the tension in the situation.

    
    

13. Adding some healthy veggies and meat to my meals can help keep me strong, but always check that they’re safe for me first! Not all human food is good for dogs.

    I don’t need your snacks, though, no matter how much I beg for just a taste! Things like chocolate, sweets and processed foods can cause me a lot of health problems.

    The healthier I eat, the longer I’m likely to live. Keeping my weight in check is just as important; I don’t want to turn into a seal on legs! I need to run, groom myself, and protect my fragile joints so I can stay happy and active.

    
    

14. Don't walk me when it's hot. Morning walks before it gets too warm are great, but as soon as the temperature begins to rise, don't risk walking me. I would rather stay home and do stimulation games and enrichment activities where I am safe than risk getting heat stroke! Even in the evenings, the pavements and tarmac will have soaked up the heat all day and will be like radiators beneath my paws. I won't die from missing a walk or two, but I could die if I get too hot.

    To find out more about how to keep me cool during the hot days, read this blog post here!

    
    

15. Mental exercise is just as important as physical exercise! You could run me until I’m physically exhausted, but if my brain isn’t tired, I’ll still find ways to keep myself busy, whether you like it or not.

    Many owners think that wearing me out physically will do the trick, but all it really does is build my stamina, meaning I’ll need even more exercise next time. And more. And then more.

    Instead, challenge my brain, too! Teach me new tricks, let me hone my sniffing or hunting skills, and give me tasks that make me think.

    For more enrichment ideas, check out this blog post here!

    

    
    

16. Some house plants and garden plants can be toxic to me, so keep them out of reach.

    
    

17. Supervise me with children at all times.

    I might love spending time with kids, but you are my advocate. If I show signs of stress or discomfort, whether with a child or any person, it’s up to you to help me out of the situation before it escalates.

    We dogs rarely bite out of aggression. It’s almost always a last resort—a self-defence mechanism when we feel there’s no other option. But if you’re supervising properly, I won’t have to make that choice.

    And never, ever let children use me as a climbing frame, pull on my tail, or stand on me. Don’t be the reason I pay the price.

    
    

18. You can't control other dogs' behaviour, but you can control mine. It is your responsibility to keep me safe from the world, but also to keep the world safe from me.

    If my recall is not reliable 100% of the time, keep me on a lead unless we are in a secure field. Otherwise, I might run up to a dog who is not so friendly and end up bitten, or I could run away if spooked, I might be hit by a car or even be stolen. To read up more on your responsibility as a dog owner, check out this blog post!

    
    

19. I have the potential to be a great, friendly dog and the perfect companion, but the results depend on you. The way you teach me, support me, and advocate for me will shape who I become.

    Rescue dogs might come with different challenges, but that doesn’t mean they’re set in stone.

    
    

20. Dogs can learn no matter their age. "You can't teach an old dog new tricks!" is a myth.

    
    

21. I'd rather spend time with you than have all of the best toys and chews in the world. You are the most important thing in my life. I know I am only a part of your world, but you are my entire world. Spending time with you is all I really care about.

    
    

At the end of the day, being a responsible dog owner isn’t about control—it’s about understanding. I don’t need perfection, just consistency.

I don’t need endless exercise, just a balance of mental and physical stimulation.

Take the time to know me, advocate for me, and set me up for success. When we work together, we build trust. And with trust, life gets better for both of us.

Thanks for reading my letter.

I love you!

You dog.